Winter Beer is Here

It was 70 degrees over the weekend here in the Mid-Atlantic, but then yesterday it was 40 degrees, and today it is nearly freezing, so I think I can officially start talking about winter beers; what I'm drinking, and what you should be drinking.  If you regularly attend AA meetings, then please move on, nothing to see here.  And this is not just the typical Sam Adams winter lager, or Sierra Nevada's winter brew, but stuff you might need to dig around for if you want a sip of it.

Dogfish Head Namaste: Belgian style witbier, one of the "cheaper" beers on this list, it goes down very smoothly, but one bottle is pretty much enough for one sitting.

Sierra Nevada Brux: Yes, SN is a big brewery and I just made fun of them at the top of this post, but this is not your typical mass-produced winter beer.  And it's not just SN, they brewed this with another group, Russian River Brewing.  Very dry, very spicy, this is not a "I'm going to drink this whole thing in one sitting" beer.  And it actually fits into the category of "I'm going to keep this beer on my shelf for a year and open it later."

Allagash Hugh Malone: Allagash did a big series of beers here, but this one is my favorite of the lot.  Belgian IPA, I'm a sucker for Belgian style beers, and IPA's, so it was two thumbs up from me as soon as I opened the bottle.  Although this year's Fluxus is a close second.

North Coast Old Rasputin: If you can get your hands on a bottle of this, get two, and then send me one.  I have yet to find this on a shelf anywhere.  A buddy of mine had a bottle that we dove into two weeks ago, and it was phenomenal.  Since then I've been looking for it, but have not yet found a store that carries it.  It's dark, it's thick, just the way sergei likes his men.

Boulevard Bourbon Barrel Quad: Again, good luck finding it.  You might need to actually travel to Missouri where it's brewed.  I had a bottle at a restaurant in Tennessee (you're the only ten I see) a couple of weekends ago, and they said their supply was running out quickly.  I know they had it at my local favorite beer store at some point, but now there's just a big link saying "click here if you want to know when we will have this in stock again."  Fuckers.

Delirium Noel: It's strong and dark, in the same vein as their Nocturnum that you might be familiar with, but a bit stronger, and harder to find since it's only around for a couple of months.  What's kinda cool is you can get it in a big bottle, or you can actually get a 6-pack of it.

Kasteel Rouge: Last, but not least, the gayest beer of the group so far.  Very fruity, but you'll fucking love it.  Big bottle, but you will sit down and drink the whole thing if you're not careful. 

It's Tuesday! Time for Titties!

That Kate Upton, she's quite a girl

Current All BPF Team

Here is what I consider to be the best players by position currently in BPF. Sad that several of my players were in the top 3 position-wise, including the Chief. In the end, with some decisions really easy (Rosado), some were tougher (2B and CF especially).

Catcher:

Hardball Dynasty's

Joel Yearwood

1B

Hardball Dynasty's

Alfredo Jarvis

2B

Hardball Dynasty's

Jolbert Santana

3B

Hardball Dynasty's

Lance Foster

SS

Hardball Dynasty's

Max Andino

LF

Hardball Dynasty's

Pep Choo

CF
This one was a bit tough. Hawksworth, over in Scottsdale, should have this spot based solely on offense and awards. I looked at defense though, and a team needs a lead-off hitter, so behold:

Hardball Dynasty's

Eugenio Sojo

RF

Hardball Dynasty's

Buck Cain

DH

Hardball Dynasty's

Wascar Rosado

RSP

Hardball Dynasty's

Robert Slaughter

LSP

Hardball Dynasty's

Curtis McMillon If this was my team, they'd still get swept in the playoffs.

The NL, Viva La Balancia!

Well fuck me with a pineapple and call me Wendy.

here's the abbreviated predictions, since I lost all my fucking work.

The picture theme was a goole search for Halloween Hotties

NL North

Helena 85-77
Iowa City 72-90
New Britain 62-100
Cincy  55-107

NL East

Bawlmer  92-70
St Lou  86-76
Rochester  82-80
Boston  77-85

NL South 

Jacksonville  95-67
Atlanta 92-70
Jackson  78-84
Tampa  72-90

NL West 

Albykerky  94-68
Anaheim  84-78
Colorado  79-83
Arizona 76-86

Sorry, but I just don't have the time to re-write my dazzling literary and HBD forecasting genius. Not sure what the fuck happened, but that's two years in a row this has happened. NJ you win this seasons battle of the previews. And may our daughters never appear on some jerks fantasy baseball blog dressed up as sluts. We can only hope.

The AL can blow me

I mean, hi, welcome baseball fans.  BPF is now 19, and you know what that means.  It means we're now one year less hot than before.  We'll be even less hot when we're 20.  Then there will be a short spike when we hit 21 and can drink legally at the bars (yes Canada, I know, I know, fuck off).  Then we'll start getting fat at 22 and he'll move on to another 18-year-old.  It's the way of the world. 

Two 100 game winners in the AL North last year, with a third that was just four games behind that mark.  Montreal and Milwaukee will probably repeat those performances again this year, they are both stacked.  Montreal has maybe the best pitching staff in all of BPF, and while Milwaukee doesn't have a bunch of slackers on the mound, it's their offense that will carry them.  Minnesota did it last year with smoke and mirrors, I have no clue how they won 96 games, and I just can't see them doing that again, unless they can spend their whole season playing the AL East (I'll get to you 'tards in a minute).  I think their secret is having a bunch of average to slightly above average players, but nobody who really sucks.  And then there's Fargo; maybe the highest paid sub .500 team in all of BPF.  Predictions: Montreal and Milwaukee fight for the top spot and each crack 100 wins again, Minnesota comes back down to earth and plays .500 ball all year, and Fargo approaches 100 losses again to round out the division.

If you can play .500 ball, then you can win the AL East.  Hey alogman, you're playing with a bunch of morons/tankers, you don't need to spend $100M to win your division.  I kid because I love.  Or do I?  Chicago will win this division again, they have some really good pieces in all parts of the field, and should do a lot better than last year.  Then.....fuck, I dunno.  Philly moved to Cleveland, and Columbus moved to Syracuse, and both are spending a fair amount of money.  Maybe they can both stay out of the 100 loss category?  Louisville has an outside chance at staying out of that category as well, but I think they'll finish at the bottom, with Cleveland and Syracuse banging around for the 2nd and 3rd place spots, but neither will be in the hunt for the wild card when you've got so many good teams in other divisions.

Down in the South, joe has very quietly built a solid franchise in Houston.  Does anyone remember them winning the WS in S16?  Me neither.  But they've been at 95+ wins each of the last five seasons, and will probably make it six this year.  Defense is a minor concern, but when you've got pitching like they have, maybe nobody has to catch the ball.  Did you know the homo's have been above .500 each of the last two seasons?  I know, crazy, right?  sergei has been throwing money at the problem, and it seems to be working.  Lots of defense, lots of hitting, and some not-so-shitty pitching, they're looking at yet another season about .500 and in the playoff hunt.  Florida has some studs and should be better than they are.  Did we ever establish why ghutton left in the first place?  Did I ask this last season too?  He tanked for three seasons, went to the WS in S15, then was gone after S17 and 96 wins.  Weird.  Anyway, good defense and great hitting, with some above average pitching, Florida should be in the hunt for a wild card spot too.  I think everyone is in the hunt for the WC.  Well, not Richmond.  They suck.  One or two stud pitchers, one or two stud hitters, but then a big drop-off.  The world needs ditch diggers, Danny.  Prediction: Houston, then a dog fight between KC and Florida, then about 20 games until you find Richmond.

Wait.  SLC has 5 guys who are 80 or more for their overall, and his payroll is only $28M?  I call shenanigans.  I need to get back into the IFA market.  After 95 wins last year, they should be looking at 100 wins this year.  Maybe.  Unless Scottsdale wins 120.  Maybe the best set of gloves in all of baseball, and they aren't pussies either, they've got some stud hitters and a great pitching staff too.  The swings in team quality in the AL are pretty staggering.  Either you're gonna win 100 games, or lose 100 games, but there aren't many in the middle.  Because then you've got Vancouver, who has great defense and hitting, and the pitching staff is really solid, I'm just not sure how many innings cam will get out of them.  Gonna need lots of innings from the bullpen.  And then there's a team in Honolulu, but.....unless you can win 100 games in the AL, nobody cares about you.  Prediction: Scottsdale, then SLC, then 'Couver, then Honolulu. 

So we'll see Montreal and Scottsdale get the bye's in the first round, with Houston and Chicago winning the other two divisions, and then Milwaukee and SLC/Vancouver being the Wild Cards. 

Go Nats

September Fails

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/26/best-fails-of-september-2012_n_1916091.html?ncid=txtlnkushpmg00000035

An Interview With The Chief

There are some mornings when Vancouver Coastals owner and GM, camden68, starts the day with the remains of last night's 26er of some retrograde rocket fuel and a jolly game of Russian Roulette. Lately Heinie Cormier has Mr. 68 putting an extra round in the chamber. No luck so far. So The BPF Gazette-Chronicle-Herald-Times-Star-Post-Patch-Shopper sat down with the player Coastal fans have dubbed "Chief RunningJoke". Other monikers dropped on "Chief" have included "The Sultan Of Suck", "TheUnnatural", and, perhaps most cruelly, "Useless Fucking Piece of Shit"

BPFGCHTSPPS: Thanks for sitting down with us Heinie. First off, just why do you suck so bad?

HEINIE: My name is a euphemism for ass. I like the sound of my bat creating an out. I suck.

BPFGCHTSPPS: Have you ever thought about not being a worthless piece of shit?

HEINIE: No, never.

BPFGCHTSPPS: Vancouver fans realize you aren't MVP material but they believe you should be better than a .220 hitter, do you agree with them.

HEINIE: Obviously not. I think it takes a lot of courage to hit 60 points below your ratings. Plus the owner/GM is the worst owner in HBD. They way reigny can squeeze 50-55 wins out of nothing, and camden can barely scratch .500 witha stacked ML roster proves it. Look at his playoff record. He used to make playoffs after playoffs with 110 win teams, but has made a grand total of one World Series. Usually he never wins a playoff game. his team's just quit on him. For instance, look at this guy from his old team in Gehrig:

Royce Tannehill Rochester Red Royal North Stars Age: 31 B/T: R/R Born: Dubois, WY Position(s): P (SP3) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

.

Check out his playoff stats compared to his regular season stats. That's all camden68. Nobody likes playing for him. I think it's because he's as clueless as I am.

BPFGCHTSPPS: That's a pretty serious charge because you are simply awful.

HEINIE: Like attracts like, you reap what you sow, yaddayaddayadda. I want to play for an owner, any owner, that's not camden68. Maybe I will start playing to my ratings, but until then I will continue to approach the plate fully secure in the knowledge I'm the next out. I like to call myself Mr. 0-4. Nothing is more satisfying than a weak grounder back to the pitcher. A pop foul to first also feels pretty good.

BPFGCHTSPPS: Well Heinie, you really are a worthless piece of shit. Thanks for your honesty and good luck sucking the rest of the way.

HEINIE:You're welcome.

yeah