Football's Back, Hooray!

Nabilla Benattia

Season 22 NL West, then I'm done, and I can go home.

NL West

Arizona Outlaws (NL) bbwinksdaddy View Hardball Dynasty Profile

 
The model of a middle of the road franchise, never too high, never too low. With OKC, sliding backwards, a well tooled Arizona could make some noise. Unfortunately the tools aren't well tooled. No standouts in the line-up and won't take many walks, or hit buckets of bombs. The defense is very good, especially where it should be. Pitching isn't fabulous. Another middle of the road season, me thinks.

Oklahoma City Victory Dolls (NL) njohnson78 View Hardball Dynasty Profile

It has begun, the great decline in the Southern Heartland, where the wind comes sweeping down the plain. Still features BPF legend and Dean's, little brother, Buck the Schmuck and Lance Foster, but after those two, there's not a lot to write about offensively. Defense is weak tea, man, weak tea. nj thinks I'm short on innings? He's an injury away from major arm strains. Turns out the Victory Dolls are an actual roller derby team. A friend of mine does that out west. Fucking multi-tattooed hipster punks.

Salem Volcanoes (NL) stonewalter View Hardball Dynasty Profile

 I will leave aside all cheesy jokes and references to a certain Hollywood, Courts Martial drama. Welcome highly prolific stonewalter, a man of many, many teams. Between him and alogman, HBD is being kept alive. Thanks boys. This is a team on the upswing, looking very strong to claim the division. Offense is not exactly spectacular, but it is capable of putting up runs. Pitching is very good, anchored by ace Midre Brandt. As for the defense, ya, not great. Still, we should see a changing of the guard in the West.

San Francisco Barking Seals (NL) rocketcy View Hardball Dynasty Profile

This is a team that keeps surprising me. I mean 95 wins from this squad is wildly insane. It's not that it's an awful team by any stretch, but 95 wins?! As the kids say these days, WTF?! I still see a .500 team, but there must be something I'm missing. Very strong defense up the middle. Pitching and hitting are capable but there isn't anyone to knock your socks off. No real big power threat in the line-up, yet they score more than they allow. rocketcy is working some serious mojo, sittin' on the dock of the Bay.

 

SALEM  90-72
SAN FRANCISCO 86-76
OKLAHOMA  85-77
ARIZONA 72-90

There, done, fini, complete, I hope you enjoyed my erudite labours. Good luck in the season ahead, all. 

NL preview part trois

NL South

Tampa Bay Grays (NL) keithjs View Hardball Dynasty Profile

I went to Tampa when i was a kid. A catfish shit all over my hands, and the hotel had a freaking giant wasps nest. Actually looked like the lobby was built around it. You are an odd lot, you Americans. Very, very odd. Back to the catfish shitting on my hands, this team isn't super. Or good. Defense isnt' bad, but the offense don't got much in terms of control, power, splits, or eye. Pitching also boasts less than spectacular splits. The Grays exceeded my expectations last season. Don't think that'll happen this season.

Jackson Generals (NL) playboy33 View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Did you know if you google Jackson Genitals, you get many pictures of the deceased King Of Pop, and accomplshed kiddy-diddler, Michael Jackson? It's true!Former team stud Emil Manuel has been dealt to Louisville leaving a sizable hole in the line-up. There's not a power threat in the order, and there's not much else threatening either. Defense: nope. Pitching: nope. The thing about my baby, it don't matter if he's eight or nine, doodoodoodoodoodoo

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Atlanta Bullochs (NL) bluegreyjay View Hardball Dynasty Profile

This is a team swinging for the fences. Big power bats abound. Defense is solid and the pitching works. Will it be enough to retain the division for a fifth straight season? Could be a challenge, especially considering Jacksonville should have taken it last season. I'm surprised to see Atlanta hasn't won a BPF crown, I thought they had. jub's did, with the franchise, way back in season 1. Good to see a franchise continually win 90+, while keeping the payroll low and prospect scouting up. Still have no clue what a Bulloch is. Jim J. Bullock?

Jacksonville Jimmies (NL) bnags View Hardball Dynasty Profile

The payroll has skyrocketed to almost 47 mil! Uh-oh. Didn't do as well in the regular season, last year, as i thought they would. But rolled to the World Series, before being rolled by Salt Lake City. They still look better than Atlanta, less power, but more pure hitters. Defense is very strong, and the pitching, while not stunningly deep, is more than adequate. It's going to be a battle, once again, in the NL South.

JACKSONVILLE 93-69
ATLANTA 90-72
TAMPA BAY 63-99
JACKSON 58-104

AL Part Dos

AL South - I kinda want to just skip it.  Can I skip it?  Well, I guess they've got......

Houston - 76 wins last year, after five 100+ win seasons in the previous six years.  WTF?  Huge payroll, and still quite a bit of star power at the top end.  Shep, Bobby Slaughter and Virgil lead the pitching staff, while Malik and Johnny and Roy give me a boner.  The defense is enough to get by, but they really hurt the offense when it comes to the SS/2B spots.  My very early prediction: another  sub 80 win season and we will see the payroll get slashed as guys get shipped away.

Richmond - 73 wins last season, and I'm still trying to figure out how Houston and Richmond can be in the same division.  But I digress.  This team has never made it beyond the first round of the playoffs.  Fact.  Will bringing in Davey Torres help get them over that hump?  Maybe?  Possibly?  Unlikely.  Jim, Leo, and Bucky will do what they can for the pitching staff, and Davey will help Phil get the offense sorted out, and the defense isn't too terrible......am I talking myself into these guys making a run?  I just might be!  Go Informers!!!  Prediction: 85 wins

Santa Fe - 56 wins last year, under new ownership this year, panda do something!  Or don't.  A fairly high budget, but no really big names.  Holy shit, Mac Collins is still alive!!  The pitching is fairly average, while the hitting is borderline atrocious.  But hey, we've got some defense!  Go team!  My suggestion: lots of "fan days" at the ballpark this summer, to try and get attendance above 1000.  60 wins, maybe.

Kansas City - 64 wins last year, yet still not last place in the division.  The first pitch of the season hasn't been thrown yet, and KC already has spent nearly as much in prospect money as they have in player salary, $27.1M vs $18M.  There are five guys on the ML roster with overalls of 70 or more, but the top guy maxes out at 74.  Oh my.  I think if you took the top 25 prospects in the minors, and played them against the ML squad, the game would probably be tied at 0-0 at the end of the 9th, and would proceed for another 20 innings before someone would score on a wild pitch.  It's gonna be a long one.  Prediction: 60 wins, maybe.  Deja vu.

You get two pictures because I like you:

AL West - Now we're talking!  A division full of .500+ teams and two 100+ win squads, let's get excited!!!

Colorado Springs - 118 wins last year, under new management as kemo also died last season.  Oh, he's still alive too?  Oops.  World Series champ, and then quits the game?  I mean I guess if there was a time to bail, it would be when you're on top of the world.  Kinda hard to time that though.  You'd have to get rid of every team except for the one that you think might win the WS, and then cross your fingers that you actually win it that season.  Did anyone talk to him?  Did he actually plan this?  I'm not even angry, I'm impressed.  Anyway, you'd have to fuck up pretty bad to not win the WS again with this team.  It's just stacked with talent from top to bottom.  Maybe the rotation could use a little bit of a boost, but the bullpen is more than enough to back them up.  The offense is impressive, the defense is the best in the world, you'd be crazy to not pick them to win it all again.  And you'd have to be a moron to fuck it up.  Prediction: 120 wins and another WS.

Vancouver -I had a big write-up all put together, but blogger fucked it up because they don't like the "less than" sign in text.  It reads it as code and the rest of your texts gets fucked.  I'm not happy.  Now I'm trying to remember what I said.  Did you know Humberto Alarcon is still alive and kicking?  I miss that guy.  The rotation concerns me because there aren't many innings eaters in that mix.  Six SPs to give everyone an extra day off is a good idea, but might strain the bullpen.  I bet there will be a tandem thrown in at some point.  Prediction: less than 100 wins.  I think that's what I predicted before.  Fuck you blogger. 

Scottsdale - 82 wins last season, following a 72 win season, which followed a very long streak of dominance when griffey won between 94 and 107 games for seven seasons.  They still have some studs, with Daryl and Jimmy and Sal leading the veterans, while young guns like Kris Price are coming up and filling ML roles.  The pitching and hitting are quite solid, while the defense is a bit average (who is going to play 2B?).  The price is right, the question is whether or not these guys can play above their pay grade for another season.  Prediction: 75 wins

Honolulu - 81 wins last year, more money being spent this year, and while the roster is quite deep, there are no superstars.  Do you need a superstar to win?  Well, kinda.  The pitching, hitting, and defense are all very average.  Very.  I'm trying to get excited.  Come on, come on, come on, get excited!  Nope, no luck.  Wait, I know what will get me excited:

NL Preview continued:

NL East

Buffalo Mooseknuckles (NL) nyaggie98 View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Nicely exceeded my seemingly teenage expectations (I need help...wait...what?), last season. A hearty congrats to nyaggie, way to go, soldier. Now, has Buffalo stayed the course, progressed, or declined? I dunno, looks like what I saw last season. Very good in the field, especially up the middle. This will be of great benefit to a non-intimidating collection of burly hurlers. As for the hitters, they will rake off southpaws, but aren't possessed with huge power, as a whole. Middle of the road NL squad.

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Chicago Wet Bandits (NL) jstnklly View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Shaved 6 mil off payroll from the season before, slashed to a measly 125 millioroonees. Bud Perez has come and gone after one productive season in los Ciudad Ventoso, in a trade of discussion. Cristobal Perez was brought in free agency. Perez's first three seasons plus were outstanding, now he's merely very good. Good, solid offense, always a Chicago strength. Pitching isn't the equivalent of the offense. Perez and Hughes are a nice one-two combo in the later innings. Defense is a strength. a very strong strength. Almost the strengthiest.

San Juan Giants (NL) coachbug View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Welcome to HBD and BPF, mr coachbug. Don't be shy about asking questions, we are here to help. Well, not nj, he's the opposite of help. But he's cute, or so imagine him to be. Where was I? Oh, ya welcome mr coachbug. tomhighway has left us (he says temporarily) again, leaving a team in the midst of continued rebuilding. Adding Bud Perez gives some star power. Not much else to make a pitcher nervous, though. Defense at short is good, but fairly mediocre everywhere else. Pitching is worrisome and will hand out a sizable amount of free passes. Bring comfy shoes, you'll be doing some walking. Don't get frustrated, coachbug, jjust get to know the game.

Baltimore Terrapins (NL) rootgargle View Hardball Dynasty Profile

In what is, sadly and fuckyouably, rootgargle's final season in both BPF and HBD, baltimore looks to go out in a blaze of slightly above mediocrity. I don't see another World Series Title as a final note to roots HBD swan song. You know something, I barely have the time to be me, but i find the time. Find the time, root. Find the time. So on to the Terrapind. Pitching is definitely the strength of this squad. The opposite of San Juan in that the pitchers won't hand out a lot of walks. Defense is strong. The line-up doesn't overpower, but will do some damage, enough, if the pitching stays true and the defnese performs, to win more than they lose. Bye, root. You will be missed, and i will leave a light on for you. And about those titles, just send a ticket to admin to have them transferred to me. Thanks, in advance.

Baltimore  86-76
Chicago  84-78
Buffalo  75-87
Boston  65-97