AL North:
Milwaukee, 87-75 last season, Fire Sale!! Fire Sale!! Wait, no, just kidding, we're still spending $80M on players, with Pep and Jarvis still on the roster! A little short on innings eaters, but wow they've got some bats. Defense is pretty solid, but not sure if it'll be enough to help the pitchers. This should be an interesting season for these guys.
Minnesota, 81-81 last season, lots of consistency for these guys over the last ten seasons. A very average roster, lots of guys in the 70's, so they don't look impressive. I like the pitching, but the offense is very average, while the defense is really lacking. Did I say this same thing last season? I feel like I did. So I'm gonna predict the same.....prediction. .500 ball for these guys, yet again.
Madison, 79-83 last year, blapo comes in after paranoid destroyed a 100 win team. These guys are getting older, but they're still really good. Defense is pretty good, pitching is still quite solid (thanks for the draft picks for Felsen), and have some stud hitters with Carlos, Tom, Chipper, the other Carlos, and Geraldo. If the pitching staff can keep the opposition under 10 runs, the offense could get them back up into the 100 win range. Maybe. Possibly?
Fargo, painfully bad last season. Seriously, gmurph, make the playoffs. What is going on over there? I am just perplexed by this squad. Overall, they're average. Defense, average. Pitching, average. Hitting, average. Lots of average going on here, looks like another top 5 draft pick.
Order of finish - Madison, Milwaukee, Minnesota, Fargo
AL East:
Syracuse, 98 wins last season, most since S8 when it was devon and the Yankees. I miss devon. Kinda. Anyway......these guys are really fucking good. When Max Bautista is getting $20M to be the mopup pitcher, you know you're in good shape with your pitching staff. But the bullpen has a few holes, so hopefully the starters give up no runs and make life easy on those poor slubs out in the pen. Good hitters, with below average defense. Could be really great this year, or it could blow up in their face.
Louisville, 82 wins, jubs is back!! You shouldn't get too excited about 84 wins and 82 wins on consecutive seasons, but when the seven previous were sub .500, you get excited about being middle of the field. Defense down in LVille is pretty solid, pitching staff is decent and might be what carries these guys, while the hitters are going to really beat the shit out of the ball. Like for serious, I'm too lazy to look it up, but they might set a new record for HR's in one season.
Cincy, 67 wins last year, $42M payroll, uh oh. Average defense, below average pitching, one good hitter and that's about it. Yikes. That's all you get. Yikes.
Chicago, 60 wins last year, these guys are in major rebuild mode. I mean.......wow. They're really not good. A couple of guys who can actually play SS/CF, but then the pitching is horrible, and the hitting is quite below average. Look for $40M+ in prospect this year, as they slash salaries yet again. It's gonna be bad.
Order of finish - Syracuse, LVills, Cincy, Chicago, just like last year
AL South:
Richmond, 91 wins, jcarver has got his shit together. More gloves than they know what to do with, some really solid pitching and innings eaters, and some stud hitters. Where did these guys come from? They're not winning the world series, might not even get past the first round, but they'll be good.
Houston, 83 wins last season, these guys are one of the more consistent franchises in the last ten seasons. $110M in salaries, this might be the last year of crazy money being spent on players. Bobby Slaughter is good, Johnny and Malik will get it done at the plate, but the defense will struggle. They'll contend for a playoff spot, but this might be the last year that they try for that, and next year might be when they start rebuilding.
San Antonio, 72 wins last year, root is back! $75M, he ain't fucking around with a rebuild or anything. Good defense, good pitching, good offense. Well, average offense. Mac Collins is still alive. Who knew? I'm rooting for San Antonio. Get it? Rooting. Root. Shut up.
KC, 60 wins last year, what the fuck. Ever since the 90 wins back in S18, it's been a pretty steady decline for the faggots. Benny Lopez helps for sure, but at $20M/year, yikes. The defense is going to struggle, but the pitching might take some of the heat off of them. And if that doesn't work, I think the hitting will take even more heat off. Especially if they hit as many HR"s as I think they might. They might rival Louisville in that category.
Order of finish - Richmond, KC, Houston, San Antonio
AL West:
Colorado Springs is the new Milwaukee/Montreal. 114 wins last year was a "down" season for these guys, after 118 and 116 the prior two seasons, including a WS in S21. tenacious, you had ONE job!! This roster is just stacked. Gloves, arms, bats, speed (Jack Bergen was a 40/40 guy last season), they've got it all. And I wish I could say that they were an aging ballclub that needed to do something in a quickly closing window, but nope, they're all in their 20's. Assholes! A couple of guys will have arb issues coming up next year and the year after, but that just means a little drop in $ in another category, which these guys already don't care about, since they're already slashing the medical and training budgets. Hands-down, the favorites to win it all this year.
Honolulu, 102 wins last year, not really sure how they did that. Did we vote ice_rat as owner of the year? We should have, going from 81 wins to 102 wins in just one season, that's the kind of thing that makes you a legend in town. Too bad this town only cares about bikinis and beaches. Wait, that's not too bad. That's what all of us should care about. Anyway, they've got some decent gloves, some decent pitching, some decent hitting.....again, how did they win 102 games last year? What am I missing? I can't see it happening again this year, at least not in that division.
Vancouver, you know you're in a tough division when you win 100 games, but still end up third in your division and have to settle for a wild card spot. A lot of talent from top to bottom, with a good mix of vets and young guys. Lunsford, Belinda, Alarcon, they're getting it done on offense, while the pitching staff is still one of the best in the AL. But can they get over the hurdle that is Colorado Springs?
Scottsdale, 68 wins last year, the fewest since S12. Still spending money on a handful of studs, but these guys are clearly in dramatic rebuild mode. Not a single fuck was given about defense, as the best glove is a 78, and there is no help in sight, unless Workman, Barr, or Smith get called up from AA. The pitching and hitting actually aren't that bad at the top, but the drop-off after the first two or three guys is pretty bad. Could be a really long year in Scottsdale, hopefully they can land a $10M IFA to help keep the spirits up.
Order of finish: Colorado Springs, Vancouver, Honolulu, Scottsdale
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